fix essay 2

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– here the essay you wrote i need you to fix couple things to me .

here is my teacher comment just read it and do what he wants please .

teacher comment : There are some details in here that are raising questions for me, Ghofran. For one thing, it begins with “Recently,” and that suggest that there would be an article or debate in the news that would be referenced right away. It also seems a lot of different kinds of surveillance are being grouped together, and they seem like separate things.

Interestingly, just today, there was an article about how the SDPD was going to buy some cell phone hacking software (Links to an external site.), but decided not to for cost reasons. That’s a reminder that “the government” or “the police” aren’t monolithic or all-powerful. They’re systems that are full of complexities and people making decisions.

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